new song and date night

So, my new favorite song is called Speeding Cars by Imogen Heap. Its SO beautiful. Her voice is clear and there is no guessing about it. Every note is perfect.

I had a date last night. It was sort of a modified date, because ground rules were set before we even set the date, and we're just getting to know each other better. There is one big reason that we're not dating now, or in the near future so I get to play the patience card again... or I guess for the first time... haha.

If there is one thing that I struggle with in life it is patience. I am not gifted in the waiting department. But I've NOT waited in relationships in the past and the formula has been consistent: we date, I dump, we're hurt (and ironically enough, they end up closer to God, and we end up friends). Regardless though, it hurts, and it's too hard. This time I don't want to screw it up. So, everything is on the table, we both know where each other is at. I don't doubt that God can and will work in his life, its just the waiting and trusting.

One good thing though, is my prayer life is a million times better. I pray for him, I pray for me, I pray for anything else I can think of, and I pray again and again. Its amazing the change I can see in my relationship with God in only a few weeks of consistent communication... weird how that is the way it is in any relationship... odd how you get closer when you TALK. haha

I've gotten interesting feedback from friends and family on this one. Not all the same as with other boyfriends. (with a couple exceptions) Mostly people know him and I and think its fun that we click and are just saying to be careful and take it slow. I'm not getting the looks or serious talks all the time like I have in previous relationships. That is one big difference between this one and past ones. Its really nice not to get the flack.

This isn't completely consistent though. I know I'm being smarter about this one and getting reefed on for repeating mistakes is getting old. I don't even feel like arguing anymore. I'm NOT doing anything wrong or stupid. I'm just getting to know someone. If something happens someday then it will be in Gods time. I'm trusting him this time, and I know its hard to see that from the outside, but getting told I shouldn't be doing something or that I'm doing something wrong from good friends all the time is so hard. At least its not everyone. I hate NOT talking about whats going on in my life, but I guess I sort of have to filter what I talk about with some people because I'm tired of hearing about it. Some people are awesome and curious and supportive and want the best for me, and it seems like others just want to be right. And I'm tired of being wrong.

There is my rant portion of this blog.

On a positive note, here is a list of things that I like about him:

He's honest.
He's a good driver, but not a boring driver. He knows how to use his vehicle.
He doesn't mess around. He's straight with you. There is no guessing.
He's sarcastic and CRACKS me up.
He reads.
He laughs in movies at the same parts as me.
He's unapologetic about liking guy stuff, but its ok if I know a few things about guy stuff too. (and ok when I don't haha)
He doesn't make me feel like I have something to prove to him.
He cooks! (and its ok that I don't like too)

Alright, that's not all, but I'm feeling sappy now, and I'm supposed to be patient here.

I should get back to work... and watching the Oilers game (which is on in the background now because he likes hockey. I'm such a geek.)